I once read that there is a specific soulfulness to sexy. That hotness is a little more vapid and temporary, whereas sexy is wildly emotional and raw. Sexuality is at the core of who we are.
Well, that couldn’t be more honest if it tried!
Sexiness is the way we hold ourselves and the confidence we have in ourselves! It took me a while to get there, but after reading this quote it empowered me to love myself and embrace my own individuality.
Of course there is no one in the world who would feel sexy 100% of the time because we all have our weak moments and our insecurities, heck, I’m the first person to put my hand up and admit that I have days where I feel the complete opposite of sexy but I try not to dwell on them.
Here are some of the things I do to make myself feel sexy!
Fake it till you make it!
If you haven’t gotten the jist of it by now, confidence is the key to sexiness.
There is nothing sexier to a guy or even to your peers than to see someone who is totally comfortable in their own skin – hey, if you don’t love yourself then why should anyone else?
Having said that, I know that being confident is waaaaaay easier said than done, especially why you are shy AF like me, but as they say, fake it till you make it!!
I remember being absolutely terrified of public speaking, and to this day I still am, but I kind of told myself to put on an alter ego (which is just who I would like to be if I wasn’t terrified of being judged) and it worked! I did this when I went for a job interview and they were so happy that they hired me an hour later. literally.
I had no experience in the role at all but they loved how confident I was and it obviously made me desirable to be on the team!
There’s only one you. Embrace it!
Following on from my previous point, if you don’t like yourself why would anyone else?! There is only and will only ever be one YOU in the history of time. Past, present and future. Think about that!
Stop competing with other girls and thinking that you’re not as good as them.
You are! Strive to be the best person YOU can be because no one else will ever be as more you than you are! Embrace your eyes, embrace your curves, embrace your ugly laugh – well, you may not have an ugly laugh but I do – and embrace all of your flaws and all of your strengths because they are what makes you, you!
Spend an extra 15 minutes on yourself when you get ready.
Take your time, massage your moisturiser into your skin gently and slowly rather than slapping it on.Do your hair a little differently than normal, maybe add a wing to your liner! A women who spends time on themselves will not only give off the impression that you are have more self-respect and pride but you will feel better in yourself!
Wear sexy lingerie
It is one of my biggest pet peeves when I hear my single girlfriends say “Oh no, I can’t wear this lingerie because I have no one to see it”. GIRLS, PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER! YOU DON’T NEED ANYONE. DO IT FOR YOU!
I am a huge believer that a hot pair of lingerie can change your entire mood, even if no one else sees it! Plus, if anything were to arise unexpectedly you are totally prepared!
Wear clean clothes!
If you go out wearing clothes that are dirty not only may they smell (ew!) it will also give the impression that you are a) unorganised and/or b) don’t put much pride into your appearance – both of which are unattractive qualities.
Make sure your clothes fit and invest in a good tailor!
Following from my previous post, something I would stress is to make sure that your clothes are well fitted to you body! Well fitted clothes are more flattering, can completely change the shape of your body and are more comfortable! Invest in finding a good tailor or spend that extra 5 minutes trying on each piece before you buy to make sure you get a well fitted item.
Find your scent! – Perfume wise.
Is there anything attractive about smelling like B.O? The short answer is no.
My rule is to either a) don’t smell like anything at all (clean with deodorant) or b) smell nice with a perfume!
Everyone has their own preference when it comes to their scent. For me, whilst I love the softer and fresh smelling perfumes I tend to stick with the heavier flirty scents more because they seem to suit me better – Isn’t it funny how perfumes seem to have their own personalities?! – at the moment I wear Decadence by Marc Jacobs on the daily and my two other favourites are Flowerbomb by Viktor & Rolf and Tresor La Nuit by Lancôme.
Take note of your posture!
Okay, this is easier for some more than others. I have Scoliosis and Kyphosis so no matter how straight I stand it will never look like I have picture perfect posture but I take note of if I ever feel myself slouching and try to keep my back up as straight as possible.
I feel like this should go for everyone, when your standing or sitting tall and straight you look more confident and approachable! Plus, your clothes will sit better!
Get your heart rate up, break a sweat and work out! Exercise does WONDERS your mind, body and soul. cliché I know but it could be more true!
Feel stronger, more determined and learn to push yourself to new extremes and reap the benefits! There are no disadvantages to exercise.Find something that works for you – even if it’s a 20 minute power walk – and go from there!
Strong is the new sexy!
Don’t dumb yourself down.
Don’t dumb yourself down or act ignorant to certain topics – intelligence is hot!
Not only will you be a girl who knows her shit, you will be respected and listen to if you can hold a conversation and give your own input.
Read or watch something racy!
50 Shades of Grey perhaps? This is probably TMI but after watching the TV series Outlander I was totally ready to get my uhhhh… flirt shall we say? on with my partner! …and from then on he was encouraging me to watch it more lol!
There’s something risqué about watching or reading something naughty and it really awakens your imagination. Take it to that next level and watch or read something naughty with someone else!
Communicate with your eyes!
Now don’t go mute and stare down that cute guy in the café like a crazy woman, but a few flirty glances and eye contact does WONDERS! Not only does it make you seem a little mysterious and sexy but it’s also so much fun!